Tuesday, January 22, 2013

Facing Mortality as the Mother of an Only Child with Special Needs

4 months from today I will turn 40

It's not a number I am afraid of or a milestone I don't want to hit.
There will be a celebration but with the excitement came a huge reality.

I'm going to be 40...my mom is 61...the people I have as my
"omg in case something happens to me you get Annabelle"

When you begin the adoption process it's for several reasons - you don't want to be an "older" parent - my dad died when I was 26 (he was 70) -  you are not married - * you want a little girl for sure 'cause bows and smocked make more sense*

I am hopeful but at this very moment I do not think Annabelle will ever be capable of  living alone. She will always need some sort of assistance. I never really thought she would be an only child either - my plans were always to adopt again at least once but with 2 additional adoptions falling through it just never happened...So what now?
Where do only children with special needs go when they are alone? I'm not anticipating this to happen for quite sometime but - it's a terrifying - devastating thought that quite frankly has had me in tears and on valium for the last week - I've googled questions looking for answers and found nothing - Is my only option some sort of long term care facility where she'll live out the remainder of her precious life in a room and at the mercy of others? How do you march on with that thought constantly in the back of your mind?
Is there any true preparation for something like this?  
Stay Calm
Psalms 18:32 on


Mari said...

Those are tough things to think about. It's good that we only need to make it through one day at a time, although I also have a tendency to look into the future and be afraid. When I stress about things (And believe me I do, although mine are different than yours). Anyway, it helps me to look back at how God has always provided for us, even when things looked bad, and know that He has done it in the past, reminds me that He will do it in the future too.
Annie is blessed to have you and I know God has a plan.
PS - you're just a young thing! :

Anonymous said...

It is not my first time to pay a visit this web page, i
am visiting this site dailly and obtain good facts from here daily.
Also see my web page: high performance organisations